Mum messaged me this afternoon telling me how she couldn’t stop crying because she missed him. For forty-five minutes on my bus this morning, I couldn’t stop crying because of how much I missed him. I cried again then because of how much I missed her. I couldn’t stop crying because for the first time in a long time I felt lonely. And like every other year since 2008, I was back in the ICU lost and alone.
My hands are still trembling from doing the exact opposite of what I intended to do. I booked my first solo trip for a week to Tasmania. OH-MY-GOD, YES, I DID!
I just wanna feel real love
Feel the home that I live in
Cause I got too much life
Running through my veins
Going to waste
What now? I just can’t figure it out
What now? I guess I’ll just wait it out
I should have known better than to chase something that seemed like a fantasy, but I wandered into the choppy waters anyway, unprepared. I sought something I thought I deserved but in truth, it wasn’t mine to begin with.
This morning, I was greeted by a rather rushed and grumpy bus driver. He lacked courtesy and respect. He drove like he was running out of time and almost hurt the only two passengers who got on the bus. I wouldn’t discredit the otherwise warm and welcoming bus drivers who make early morning rides bearable. Some days, their…… Continue reading Day 21 – You could be nice
We all have a rehearsed set of lines similar to our Facebook or LinkedIn bios. These are usually simple yet exciting enough. It is the story you know they want to hear even if it’s not yours to tell. It is a story of our past, our achievements and talents and outward appearances. It is a story meant for the file, but not the one that bears our soul.